Archive for the ‘Personality Development’ Category

Found this new mastery session videos

http://masterysessions.tumblr.com/

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Amazing video, make to sure to watch this without fail!

Video 1 – An Adventure Video to 100x Your Life

 

9 Powerful Body Language Tips To Instantly Boost Your Confidence

http://liveboldandbloom.com/10/self-confidence/body-language-tips

How to Never Get Angry: 3 New Secrets From Neuroscience

http://time.com/4069899/anger-management-tips/

 

10 Habits Of Ultra-Likable Leaders

http://www.forbes.com/sites/travisbradberry/2015/10/20/10-habits-of-ultra-likeable-leaders/?utm_campaign=Forbes&utm_source=LINKEDIN_COMPANY&utm_medium=social&utm_channel=Leadership&linkId=19025115

30 CEOs Reveal the Daily Habits Responsible for Their Success
Getting to the top involves doing the right things, day after day.
http://www.inc.com/christina-desmarais/30-ceos-reveal-the-daily-habits-responsible-for-their-success.html?cid=sf01002

Found an interesting article today….

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/10-truths-we-forget-too-easily-dr-travis-bradberry?trk=hp-feed-article-title-share

Developing Charisma

Posted: October 16, 2013 in Personality Development
Tags:

Increasing Your Influence in the Workplace

Have you ever worked with a very charismatic leader?

If so, then it’s likely that almost everyone in the organization liked, trusted, and admired this person.

People listened when she talked, colleagues supported her ideas, and talented people wanted to join her team. In short, everyone wanted to be around this person!

Crayon standing out.
Charisma helps you stand out from the crowd.

Charisma is something that many people believe you’re born with. However, this isn’t the case – you can become more charismatic, and we’ll explore how you can develop charisma in this article.

Defining Charisma

Charisma is a collection of traits and behaviors that make you appeal to other people. The word comes from the Greek word “charis,” which means “grace” or “gift.”

A person who is charismatic is exceptionally engaging, likeable, trustworthy, and, in many cases, a bit “magical.” Larger-than-life personalities like Marilyn Monroe, Martin Luther King, Jr., Oprah Winfrey, and Sir Richard Branson have all been known for their charismatic personalities.

People with charisma are assertive, confident, inspiring, and warm. They make a point of listening to others, and they have an innate grace that often stops people in their tracks.

As such, it’s great to be charismatic in business, even if you are not in a leadership role. When you have charisma, people want to work with you. They’re drawn to your ideas, they trust your opinion, and they’re more likely to be influenced by you.

Charisma and Power

Charisma is a form of “referent power,” which social psychologists John French and Bertram Raven identified as one of the five bases of power. Referent power is power that you have because other people like and respect you.

With that in mind, remember that charisma can be misused. Don’t use it to manipulate others into doing something that is against their interests.

Developing Charisma

Charisma is nothing more than a set of traits and behaviors that, when put together, turn you into a magnetic, engaging personality. Plenty of research shows that you can learn and perfect these traits.

For instance, studies have shown that leaders who are willing to endure hardship are seen as more charismatic by their teams, and people who have a positive outlook are more likely to have charisma. Also, what people choose to say can affect how charismatic they are.

Tip:
A common misconception about charisma is that it is closely linked with physical attractiveness. Although this can help you to be liked in some situations, it’s certainly not a requirement for being charismatic.

Ultimately, beauty is only skin deep. Your actions and beliefs can matter far more to thoughtful people than how you look.

It takes time and work to develop charisma, so pay attention to several areas. Look at developing charisma as a personal journey, and focus on one area at a time.

Let’s look at these areas in turn:

Body Language and Presence

Body language and “presence” are important aspects of charisma. Without saying a word, the right body language can transmit strength, warmth, and likability.

Start by standing up straight, with your shoulders back and your head up. Good posture not only makes you look confident and in control, but it also makes you feel this way!

Research shows that charismatic people tend to be very positive, so do your best to maintain a positive outlook.

Presence is a bit different from body language: this has to do with the quality of your attention. When you have presence, you devote all of your attention to the person you’re with, and you don’t let your mind wander to something else. You give yourself, and your attention, solely to that person.

To develop presence, start by learning active listening skills. When someone is speaking, make sure that you devote your full attention to what the person is saying, and don’t worry about what you’re going to say next. Do your best to stay in the moment and stay aware. You may be surprised by the impact this has on your relationships!

Helping Others Feel Good

Charismatic people make others feel great. Instead of focusing on their own success, they spend a great deal of time and energy trying to lift others up. By helping the people around them, they create an environment of positive energy that others are naturally drawn to.

You can do this by giving help and expertise whenever people need it. Be humble about your achievements and give people sincere praise and gratitude when they do something good.

You can also help others by becoming a mentor, by coaching less-experienced team members, and by practicing random acts of kindness like bringing in muffins to the office or making coffee for a busy colleague.

A genuine smile, when appropriate, can also help to make people feel good.

Note:
Sincerity is incredibly important in developing charisma. People will notice if you’re just “going through the motions” or are giving out insincere compliments. Make sure that you stay authentic as you work on your skills.

Emotional Intelligence and Empathy

There is a strong link between high emotional intelligence and charisma. Leaders with high emotional intelligence are aware of their own emotions, as well as of the emotions of those around them. This awareness allows them to stay cool under pressure and give people what they need emotionally.

Empathy is an important part of this. When you’re able to understand other people’s perspectives, wants, and needs, you open the door for greater understanding and connection.

Develop empathy and emotional intelligence by keeping your emotions under control, especially when you’re tired or stressed. Also, pay attention to others – by picking up on their body language and what they say, you’ll be able to identify what they want and need, and then take the appropriate action.

Self-Confidence and Assertiveness

Charismatic people have confidence, and they know how to be assertive.

Start by building self-confidence. You can do this by using your strengths more at work, by setting and achieving small goals, and by developing the knowledge and skills that you need to do your job effectively. Also, develop your public speaking skills, so that you can speak clearly and confidently in front of a group.

Assertiveness is slightly different. When you’re assertive, you communicate your wants and needs, while still respecting the wants and needs of other people. When you’re assertive, you show personal power, but you use this power with kindness, respect, and dignity.

Assertiveness and self-confidence go hand-in-hand. Once you’ve built your self-confidence, you can work on assertiveness by recognizing your wants and needs in every situation and also by recognizing the wants and needs of others. Stand up appropriately for what you need, but do this respectfully.

Key Points

Charisma is a collection of traits and behaviors that help you appeal to other people. Charismatic people are often successful, and people are naturally drawn to them. They retain the best talent in their teams, and people listen to their ideas.

Because charisma is a collection of behaviors, you can learn it. Work on developing empathy, self-confidence, and assertiveness. Be aware of what your body language is saying, and do your best to give people a genuine smile when you’re around them.

Also, make sure that you use your charisma the right way: don’t use it to influence someone to do something that is against his or her own best interests.

In business, we seem to focus less on management skills than the more glamorous and exciting work of leadership. However, while leaders may bring us vision, inspiration and challenge, these things need proper support and efficient implementation. That’s what the practice of management is about.

Managers are responsible for making sure things are done right. Therefore, effective management is an essential complement to effective leadership – and is vital for organizational success.

How Good Are Your Management Skills? Are you getting the best out of your team?

And, just as the importance of management is wide ranging, so is its scope. Managers must have an extensive set of skills – from planning and delegation to communication and motivation. Because the skill set is so wide, it’s tempting to build skills in the areas of management that you’re already comfortable with. But, for your long-term success, it’s wise to analyze your skills in all of the areas related to effective management – and then challenge yourself to make improvements in all areas.

This quiz helps you quickly identify areas of strength and weakness, so that you can capitalize on the former and manage the latter. We then direct you to resources that you can use to develop your skills still further.

How Good Are Your Management Skills?

Take this test online by visiting http://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/newTMM_28.htm, or on paper by circling the number in the column that most applies. If you take the test online, your results will be calculated for you automatically.

Statement Not
at all
Rarely Some
times
Often Very
Often
1. When I have a problem, I try to solve it myself before asking my boss what to do. 1 2 3 4 5
2. When I delegate work, I give it to whoever has the most time available. 5 4 3 2 1
3. I follow up with team members whenever I see that their behavior has a negative impact on customer service. 1 2 3 4 5
4. I make decisions following careful analysis, rather than relying on gut instinct. 1 2 3 4 5
5. I let my team members figure out for themselves how best to work together – teams are a work in progress! 5 4 3 2 1
6. I wait before disciplining a team member, so that people have a chance to correct their behaviors for themselves. 5 4 3 2 1
7. Technical skills are the most important skills that I need to be an effective manager. 5 4 3 2 1
8. I spend time talking with my team about what’s going well and what needs improving. 1 2 3 4 5
9. In meetings, I take on the role of moderator/facilitator when necessary, and I help my team reach a better understanding of the issue or reach consensus. 1 2 3 4 5
10. I fully understand how the business processes in my department operate, and I’m working to eliminate bottlenecks. 1 2 3 4 5
11. When putting together a team, I consider the skills I need – and then I seek people who best fit my criteria. 1 2 3 4 5
12. I do all that I can to avoid conflict in my team. 5 4 3 2 1
13. I try to motivate people within my team by tailoring my approach to motivation to match each individual’s needs. 1 2 3 4 5
14. When my team makes a significant mistake, I update my boss on what has happened, and then I think of it as an important lesson learned. 1 2 3 4 5
15. When conflict occurs within a new team, I accept it as an inevitable stage in the team development process. 1 2 3 4 5
16. I talk to team members about their individual goals, and I link these to the goals of the entire organization. 1 2 3 4 5
17. If I’m putting a team together, I select people with similar personalities, ages, time with the company, and other characteristics. 5 4 3 2 1
18. I think that the statement “If you want a job done well, do it yourself” is true. 5 4 3 2 1
19. I talk with team members as individuals to ensure that they’re happy and productive. 1 2 3 4 5
20. I brief my team members so that they know what’s going on around them in the organization 1 2 3 4 5

Score Interpretation

Now add up the scores you’ve circled.

My score overall is: out of 100

 

Score Comment
20-46 You need to improve your management skills urgently. If you want to be effective in a leadership role, you must learn how to organize and monitor your team’s work. Now is the time to start developing these skills to increase your team’s success! Find out how below.
47-73 You’re on your way to becoming a good manager. You’re doing some things really well, and these are likely the things you feel comfortable with. Now it’s time to work on the skills that you’ve been avoiding. Focus on the areas where your score was low, and figure out what you can do to make the improvements you need.
74-100 You’re doing a great job managing your team. Now you should concentrate on improving your skills even further. In what areas did you score a bit low? That’s where you can develop improvement goals. Also, think about how you can take advantage of these skills to reach your career goals.

Effective management requires a wide range of skills, and each of these skills complements the others. Your goal should be to develop and maintain all of these skills, so that you can help your team accomplish its objectives efficiently and effectively. Read on for ideas and resources that you can use to do this.

A Model of Effective Management

Our quiz is based on eight essential skill areas where managers should focus their efforts. By covering these basics, you’ll enjoy more success as a team manager:

  • Understanding team dynamics and encouraging good relationships.
  • Selecting and developing the right people.
  • Delegating effectively.
  • Motivating people.
  • Managing discipline and dealing with conflict.
  • Communicating.
  • Planning, making decisions, and problem solving.
  • Avoiding common managerial mistakes.

We’ll explore each of these in more detail.

Understanding Team Dynamics and Encouraging Good Relationships
(Questions 5, 15, 17)

For statements in this category, fill in your scores in the table below, and then calculate your total.

Score
Statement 5
Statement 15
Statement 17
Total Out of 15

Good management means understanding how teams operate. It’s worth remembering that teams usually follow a certain pattern of development: forming, norming, storming, and performing. It’s important to encourage and support people through this process, so that you can help your team become fully effective as quickly as possible.

When forming teams, managers must create a balance so that there’s a diverse set of skills, personalities, and perspectives. You may think it’s easier to manage a group of people who are likely to get along, but truly effective teams invite many viewpoints, and use their differences to be creative and innovative.

Here, your task is to develop the skills needed to steer those differences in a positive direction. This is why introducing a team charter and knowing how to resolve team conflict (members) are so useful for managing your team effectively.

Selecting and Developing the Right People (Questions 11, 17)

For statements in this category, fill in your scores in the table below, and then calculate your total.

Score
Statement 11
Statement 17
Total Out of 10

Finding great new team members, and developing the skills needed for your team’s success is another important part of team formation.

You can improve your recruiting skills with our Recruiting Skills Bite-Sized Training pack (members), and with our articles on Hiring People – Questions to Ask (members), InBox Assessment, Using Recruitment Tests (members) and Aptitude Testing (members).

And you can develop people’s skills with our articles on, among others, Successful Induction (members), Understanding Developmental Needs (members), Training Needs Assessment (members), and the GROW Model. You’ll also find our Bite-Sized Training session on Mentoring Skills (members) useful.

Delegating Effectively (Question 2, 18)

For statements in this category, fill in your scores in the table below, and then calculate your total.

Score
Statement 2
Statement 18
Total Out of 10

Having the right people with the right skills isn’t sufficient for a team’s success. Managers must also know how to get the job done efficiently. Delegation is the key to this. Some managers, especially those who earned their positions based on their technical expertise, try to do most of the work themselves. They think that, because they’re responsible for the work, they should do it themselves to make sure it’s done right.

Effective managers recognize that by assigning work to the right people (not just those with the most time available), and clearly outlining expectations, teams can accomplish much more. But it’s often difficult to trust others to do the job. As a manager, remember that when your team members have the right skills, training and motivation, you can usually trust them to get the work done right.

Find out your strengths and weaknesses related to delegation by taking quiz How Well Do You Delegate?

Motivating People (Question 13, 19)

For statements in this category, fill in your scores in the table below, and then calculate your total.

Score
Statement 13
Statement 19
Total Out of 10

Another necessary management skill is motivating others. It’s one thing to motivate yourself, but it’s quite another to motivate someone else.

The key thing to remember is that motivation is personal: we’re all motivated by different things, and we all have different levels of personal motivation. So, getting to know your team members on a personal level allows you to motivate your people better. Providing feedback (members) on a regular basis is a very powerful strategy to help you stay informed about what’s happening with individual team members. You can test your motivation skills with our quiz, and use your answers to develop your skills further.

Managing Discipline and Dealing with Conflict (Questions 3, 6, 12)

For statements in this category, fill in your scores in the table below, and then calculate your total.

Score
Statement 3
Statement 6
Statement 12
Total Out of 15

Sometimes, despite your best efforts, there are problems with individual performance. As a manager, you have to deal with these promptly. If you don’t discipline, you risk negative impacts on the rest of the team as well as your customers, as poor performance typically impacts customer service, and it hurts the team and everything that the team has accomplished. It’s very demotivating to work beside someone who consistently fails to meet expectations, so if you tolerate it, the rest of the team will likely suffer. In our article on team management skills (members), we explore this issue in further detail and give you some examples.

Team performance will also suffer when differences between individual team members turn into outright conflict, and it’s your job as team manager to facilitate a resolution. Read our article on Resolving Team Conflict (members) for a three-step process for doing this. However, conflict can be positive when it highlights underlying structural problems – make sure that you recognize conflict and deal with its causes, rather than just suppressing its symptoms or avoiding it.

Communicating (Question 8, 9, 16, 20)

For statements in this category, fill in your scores in the table below, and then calculate your total.

Score
Statement 8
Statement 9
Statement 16
Statement 20
Total Out of 20

An element that’s common to all of these management skills is effective communication. This is critical to any position you hold, but as a manager, it’s especially important (you can test your communication skills with our quiz here). You need to let your team know what’s happening and keep them informed as much as possible. Team briefing (members) is a specific communication skill that many managers should improve. Also, develop the ability to facilitate effectively, so that you can guide your team to a better understanding and serve as a moderator when necessary.

Planning, Problem Solving and Decision-Making (Questions 4 and 10)

For statements in this category, fill in your scores in the table below, and then calculate your total.

Score
Statement 4
Statement 10
Total Out of 10

Many managers are very comfortable with planning, problem solving and decision making, given that they’re often skilled specialists who’ve been promoted because of their knowledge and analytical abilities. As such, one of the most important issues that managers experience is that they focus so intensely on these skills when they think about self-development that they fail to develop their people skills and team management skills. Make sure that you don’t focus on these skills too much!

However, if you need to develop these skills, see our major sections on Problem Solving, Decision Making, and Project Management. You’ll find many rich skills improvement resources in these areas.

Avoiding Common Managerial Mistakes (Questions 1, 7, 14)

For statements in this category, fill in your scores in the table below, and then calculate your total.

Score
Statement 1
Statement 7
Statement 14
Total Out of 15

Good communication helps you develop facilitation skills, and it also helps you avoid some of the most common problems for managers. Some of these common mistakes are thinking that you can rely on your technical skills alone, asking your boss to solve your problems, putting your boss in the awkward position of having to defend you, and not keeping your boss informed. Our article on Team Management Skills (members) highlights what to do to avoid these, and other managerial problems that you should be aware of.

As we said earlier, management and leadership are closely linked, and each complements the other. To learn more about leadership and to assess your leadership skills, complete our quiz How Good Are Your Leadership Skills?

Key Points

You need to develop and improve your managerial skills on an ongoing basis as your career develops and as you meet new managerial challenges.

Whether you manage a department or a project team, it’s important to know how to get the work done right. When you’re asked to achieve something with the help of others, it’s complex – and you spend much of your time managing relationships instead of doing the actual work. So, you must develop not only your technical skills, but your management skills as well.

Delegating, motivating, communicating, and understanding team dynamics are some of the key skills needed. With those skills, along with patience and a strong sense of balance, you can become a very effective manager.

Mentoring from a Mentor’s Perspective

Building a high-performing team is a key part of being an effective leader. And this includes helping individuals within your team learn, grow, and become more effective in their jobs; which is why mentoring is such an important leadership skill.

But what does mentoring involve? And what do you need to consider before setting up mentoring relationships? In this article, we’ll highlight some things a mentor does and doesn’t do, and we’ll help you decide how far mentoring is right for you and your team.

Motivate yourself! Mentoring is a key element in developing your people

What is Mentoring?

Mentoring is a relationship between two people with the goal of professional and personal development. The “mentor” is usually an experienced individual who shares knowledge, experience and advice with a less experienced person, or “mentee.”

Mentors become trusted advisers and role models – people who have “been there” and “done that.” They support and encourage their mentees by offering suggestions and knowledge, both general and specific. The goal is to help mentees improve their skills and, hopefully, advance their careers.

What are the Benefits of Mentoring?

Mentoring can be rewarding for you, both personally and professionally. Through it, not only can you build a stronger and more successful team, but you can also improve your leadership and communication skills, learn new perspectives and ways of thinking, and gain a strong sense of personal satisfaction.

For potential mentees, the benefits of mentoring can be huge. They get focused coaching and training from a skilled, knowledgeable and experienced individual, and they also get assistance and advice in navigating the many tricky situations that can arise in the workplace. This can help them work more effectively, overcome obstacles, and break through blockages that would otherwise slow or stall their careers.

But even if you understand the benefits of mentoring and it sounds like a great idea, you have to decide whether this sort of time-consuming, in-depth relationship is right for you and for the person you’re thinking of mentoring. If the mentoring relationship has arisen informally and spontaneously, then the chances are that things are fine. However, if you’re taking a more formal approach to mentoring, it’s worth exploring your reasons for mentoring and asking yourself whether you want to take this type of commitment further.

To do so, ask yourself these questions:

  • Is mentoring the best way of developing the knowledge, skills and attitudes the potential mentee needs? Or would other approaches be quicker or more effective?
  • How will mentoring contribute toward your own career goals, and to the goals of your team and your organization?
  • Is mentoring a particular individual a good use of your time? And are you comfortable that you’ll be able to devote time to him or her on a regular basis?
  • Do you have knowledge, skills and experience that the mentee is likely to find helpful?
  • How much personal satisfaction are you likely to get from the relationship? Does this justify your involvement? And do you like the individual enough to want to invest time in mentoring him or her on a regular basis?
  • In what areas are you willing to help? Are there any areas that you don’t want to go near?

What You Should Consider

Although you may want to jump right in with both feet, make sure that you also think about these practical considerations:

  • Formality of approach – Do you want to take a relaxed, ad hoc approach to mentoring, or do you want to approach sessions in a more structured, formal way?
  • Frequency of contact – How much time can you commit to this relationship?
    • Can you meet (however you do that) weekly? Biweekly? Once a month?
    • How long can you spend in each meeting? Half an hour? An hour? More?
    • Do you want to be available between “formal” sessions?
  • Method of contact – Would you prefer face-to-face meetings, phone calls, or emails? If you were to use phone calls, who places the call?
  • Duration of partnership – Do you want to limit the length of the mentoring partnership? Do you want to set regular intervals to review whether you’re both happy with the relationship, or do you just want to informally review progress on an ongoing basis?
  • Confidentiality – How will you approach confidential business information? Think of ways to speak about general concepts and situations while maintaining confidentiality.

Where to Draw the Line

When developing a mentoring relationship, make sure you have clear boundaries of what you can and cannot do for the mentee.

Answer the above questions to help yourself define the boundaries for the relationship. Then, when you’re meeting, you’ll better understand your own mindset – what areas you’re interested in covering, and what you will and will not do.

Take the lead on where you’ll allow the mentoring relationship to go and what ground you’ll cover. As a general guide, focus on your expertise and experience. If anything is beyond your skills and abilities, refer the mentee to another expert.

For example, if a discussion about human resources issues raises a concern about employment law, consider sending your mentee to an internal expert or attorney. If conversations about work problems lead into personal or family problems, the mentee may need more focused professional help from a psychologist or therapist.

As a mentor, you can become the mentee’s confidante and adviser. You may be called upon to be a “sounding board” for all sorts of issues and concerns. So know in advance how you’re going to deal with difficult situations.

Key Points

By mentoring effectively, you can do a lot to improve the performance of key individuals within your team, thereby helping yourself reach team and organizational goals. Mentoring can also give you a great overall sense of personal satisfaction, knowing that you’re helping someone else learn and grow on a professional and personal level.

Before you begin a mentoring partnership, it’s useful to think about your reasons for becoming a mentor and the practical considerations and logistics of such a relationship. If you decide that mentoring is right for you, the time and effort that you put into it can reap great rewards that far exceed your expectations.